


As You Wish To Seem

by Daegaer



Series: Pretend to be Human [16]
Category: Saiyuki (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Androids, Disguise, Friendship, M/M, References to Illness, Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:15:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24753040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daegaer/pseuds/Daegaer
Summary: Android!Hakkai and Gojyo have a day out.
Relationships: Cho Hakkai/Sha Gojyo
Series: Pretend to be Human [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1152416
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	As You Wish To Seem

Goku was looking pale. He'd been quieter than normal for two days, but had explained himself as trying to keep on Sanzo's good side. Gojyo felt a real niggle of worry when Hakkai pointed out the obvious at breakfast.

" _You haven't had your normal appetite, Master Goku. Do you feel all right?_ "

Goku looked up from the cup of lukewarm tea he'd been nursing and nodded slowly as Sanzo glared over the top of his reading glasses at them all, pulled from his important study of the performance of tiny local baseball teams in the morning paper.

"Yeah. I'm fine."

" _Would you like something different for breakfast?_ "

"No. I'm fine. Thanks."

" _Maybe. Some. Congee,_ " Gojyo said. " _You. Always. Like. That. When. You're. Sick._ "

"No. I'm fine. Just tired. Thanks," Goku said, and resumed poking listlessly at the food laid out before him in an obvious attempt to distract them.

Gojyo looked from him to Sanzo to find his master's eyes fixed on Goku. Sanzo held up his credit card, deliberately turning back to the paper.

"Hakkai," he said. "Supplies."

" _Sir_."

"Find a pharmacy," Sanzo said in a quieter tone. "Top up our medical supplies as well."

" _Perhaps you might accompany me, sir. You remember that some persons in these towns find it unusual to sell medicines to androids who appear without supervision?_ "

Sanzo snorted and shook out his paper, turning the pages, his attention already on the small ads, like he was deeply interested in second-hand lawnmowers and personal services from oddly-named women.

"No. Figure things out; and take Gojyo, I'm tired of him waiting to pounce with herbal teas and aspirin."

Gojyo bowed, wondering if being drowned in red date tea would help cure Sanzo's asshole tendencies. 

" _Don't scowl like that_ ," Hakkai said when they were safely outside. " _Your facial servos will freeze in that expression. It would be such a shame_."

" _I'm. Not. Scowling. I'm. Just. Thinking. About. My. Deep. Love. For. Our. Master._ "

Hakkai smiled, a little sly expression that turned his face from calm to wicked.

" _And they say security models can't manage sarcasm. Let's get the medicine first. Did Sanzo give you a note?_ "

Shit. Gojyo shook his head. The last time they'd bought medical supplies they'd been kicked out of the pharmacy and had needed to bring Sanzo back in person to prove he really was their owner and really did want that many bandages and painkillers. He had not been amused.

" _Ah well. We'll be very polite and hope for the best._ "

Hakkai led the way down the street, smiling politely and bowing at passing humans who looked at them. An awful lot of humans seemed to be looking at them.

" _Perhaps they have never seen androids before_ ," he said. " _Though I am quite sure I saw one working in that repair shop we passed –_ "

" _Perhaps,_ " Gojyo said, wondering if there was something wrong with Hakkai's auditory systems. No, he was simply ignoring that last murmuring woman and the man before her - " _Hakkai. That. Man. Wondered. How. Such. A. Young. Man. Could. Afford. Me. Hakkai? They. Think. You're. Human. Why. Would. They. Think -_ "

" _The android in the repair shop_ was _a rather basic model, and we did arrive rather late last night. It's possible that no one saw us but for the staff at the inn,_ " Hakkai said. " _I suppose we're far enough from the capital that the chances of seeing something, ahem, a little less basic could be confusing._ " He gave Gojyo a coy flicker of a smile. " _How terribly flattering._ "

" _Flattering,_ " Gojyo said, putting as much inflection into his inexpressive voice as he could. Damn right he could understand and perform sarcasm. " _Right. Especially. The. Wink. That. Guy. Gave. You._ "

Hakkai's smile went from coy to – something else. He handed Gojyo his shopping bag, smiling more broadly as it was automatically taken. Then he ran his hands through his hair, disarranging it in a way that made it look – weird. Oh no, Gojyo thought. Not weird. More natural, like a human's hair that might not behave itself and blow a bit in the breeze. Hakkai looked briefly like he was running something from his memory banks and then,

"What do you think?" he said. His chest rose and fell slightly and as the breeze picked up, blowing dust down the street, he coughed, a little too ostentatiously, covering his mouth politely with one hand.

" _Cut. That. Out!_ " Gojyo said in horror. The voice was good, he had to admit, almost like Hakkai's real one, the mechanical undertones almost inaudible. 

"If our lost and abandoned friend Reverend Mother Tashi can do it, I certainly can," Hakkai said cheerfully. "Good Heavens, you don't realize until you try just how much _breathing_ humans do. Does it look realistic?"

" _I'm. Not. Answering. That,_ " Gojyo said. He looked away, sure that _someone_ was coming to deactivate them both straight away. A young woman – whose virtue was clearly negotiable, as Hakkai would say – looked right past him and smiled coquettishly at Hakkai. Gojyo looked over his shoulder and saw Hakkai look down at the ground, and back up, smiling as if unable to control himself. It was exactly how blushing girls showed their attraction in the dramas Goku loved.

" _Let's. Go,_ " Gojyo said. " _Before. You. Start. Haggling. Over. Her. Price._ "

"So vulgar," Hakkai murmured and walked on. "No, no," he said as Gojyo held out the bag. "You carry it. Silly, rich young men don't carry their own shopping."

" _I. Am. Going. To. Tell. Sanzo. And. He. Will Reprogram. You. With. A. Brick._ "

"No, you're not. This is for Goku's benefit, Gojyo – how often have we been turned away from buying medicine if Sanzo isn't with us? I bet any pharmacist will sell to me now."

Gojyo rummaged through the bag and came up with a receipt. He urgently scribbled _Anomalous statements are recorded!_ and thrust it at Hakkai.

" _You. Said. C'mon. Hakkai. Quit. This -_ " He couldn't think of any word safe enough yet strong enough to express himself.

"I've come to realize that Master Sanzo doesn't really give a damn, as long as his orders are fulfilled without him being bothered too much," Hakkai said. "I was ordered to _figure things out_ , you heard him. " He looked around and made an ostentatiously deep breathing movement, as if he were actually smelling the odours on the air. "Good heavens, how very liberating this day is. I believe I might spit on the ground." He looked askance at the sound that Gojyo made, as if attempting to grind his facial servos down, and put a hand on his arm. " _It is all just a joke, Gojyo_ ," he said in his normal voice. " _I'm not trying to do anything_ wrong _, I'm not actually going to_ lie _to anyone. You know that none of us are programmed to do that. I just thought we might do the shopping and go back with a funny story to cheer Goku up. We really would face less scrutiny when buying his medicine._ "

" _I. Wasn't. Constructed. As. A. Comedy. Android,_ " Gojyo snapped.

" _I know you have a sense of humour. Just_ look _at these simple country folk, Gojyo, taken in by city engineering – don't you think that such a thing might appeal to Goku?_ "

" _Sanzo._ Will _. Kill. You,_ " Gojyo grumbled. " _You're. A. Lunatic._ "

"So I've been told," Hakkai said in his awful, unnerving tones, fussing with his hair like a young idiot.

_Who by?_ Gojyo wondered. Sanzo preferred other insults and _he'd_ never had cause to say it before. He followed Hakkai to the pharmacy, sure that at any moment someone would stop them and stood, a silent, forbidding presence behind him as he cheerfully started ordering medical supplies. He watched Hakkai separate things out on the counter into neat piles.

"So that's the three packs of the sleeping pills, two hundred capsules of the milder painkillers, the antiseptic powder and cream, the morphine and syringes – and I'll take the whole box of those wide gauze bandages, two large bottles of whatever cough syrup comes _with_ codeine please, and a pack of those cough sweets –"

"You know you can't mix these?" the assistant said.

"Don't worry," Hakkai laughed, like he was sharing a joke about the silliness of employers. "My employer just likes never to run out. And he gets a sore throat from his prayers and chanting –"

Gojyo let his face go blank as the assistant giggled. An outright lie to a human. So much for not being programmed for it. Sanzo got a sore throat from chain smoking. Hakkai was just trying to make their master look better, he told himself. That's what it was.

"Oh," Hakkai said casually as if he'd just remembered, "I'll take a couple of packs of Nolazimide or whatever its local version is, if you have it."

The assistant rummaged in the drawers behind the counter and produced two packets before frowning.

"Hardly anyone asks for this stuff. I think it's got all sorts of side effects. I'm pretty sure it's meant to be prescription only – I should get the pharmacist to look at it herself."

"City lawsuits, making things difficult for ordinary people," Hakkai said dismissively. "Some idiot probably took their medication with whiskey and cocaine and then sued the pharmaceutical company – don't people out here have more sense? You don't think a _monk_ would get you into trouble, do you? Genjo Sanzo only takes medication when he needs to and he follows the directions to the letter."

She looked at Sanzo's credit card, lying there on the counter, back at Sanzo's supposed secretary.

"Please remind the Reverend Genjo Sanzo he really, really can't take this with _anything_ else."

Hakkai bowed slightly and added things like shampoo and toothpaste to the order until she visibly stopped worrying about their purchase. When they left Gojyo was weighted down with bags and Hakkai was enthusiastically wishing other shoppers a good day.

" _Don't. Push. It,_ " Gojyo said. " _We. Got. The. Medicine. Can. You. Quit. This. Now?_ "

"Let's buy some cakes for Goku first," Hakkai said, and led the way.

_I am going to download the ability to sigh dramatically and then I am going to do it every chance I get_ , Gojyo told himself. He followed Hakkai to a bakery and felt some amusement as the waitress didn't just sell him cakes but conveyed him to a table and brought him some tea. The cakes quickly followed on a pretty plate.

" _Oh. This. Should. Be. Good,_ " Gojyo said. " _You. Should. Have. Been. More. Precise. About. The. Order. How. Are. You. Going. To. Deal. With. This?_ "

"It has always been true that in every way  
The beauty of tea  
Is exactly like the beauty of a woman," Hakkai said, ignoring him, and pouring tea into his cup as the waitress came back with even more cakes.

She laughed.

"It's nice to hear a young man with a healthy appetite who appreciates the classics, even if I'm a bit too old to fall for the line. Is everything in order, sir?"

"Lovely, thank you."

Gojyo wondered if he should just drag Hakkai away. They were definitely going to be caught, at best Sanzo would be a laughing-stock -

"How very restful. This is really very pleasant," Hakkai mused, cradling the little cup and looking out at the street. "No wonder they enjoy this sort of thing. Shove that plant a little closer, would you?"

Gojyo glared, then surreptitiously hooked a foot around a large cheese plant's pot and pulled it close to the table. Hakkai gracefully poured his cup of tea in as he leant forward to examine the cakes.

" _Psst._ "

When he looked up Gojyo carefully rolled his eyes in exactly the way Sanzo did when anyone anywhere made a suggestion about anything. Hakkai grinned.

"Well _done_ , Gojyo. Put a shopping bag down beside me, please."

By the time the teapot was three-quarters empty, the bag was filling with carefully wrapped cakes, slipped in one by one. It was disturbing how quickly and smoothly Hakkai did it, as if he were simply packing things away for a journey, in a way that no one noticed. Maybe he was running a shoplifting protocol, Gojyo thought, and had to blank out his expression in case he attracted attention by laughing. He went stock-still, all thought of laughter fleeing as he saw the girl who had smiled at Hakkai in the street come in, look around and head straight for them.

"Hello," she said, sitting without waiting for an invitation. "You look like you need someone to share your snack with."

"Ah – hello," Hakkai said, gesturing at the plate. "I'll be going very shortly, but please, help yourself, miss."

She chose one of the final remaining cakes, a delicate fruit pastry, and took a healthy bite. "Very nice. A generous young man like yourself shouldn't be lonely. Do you want company? I'm a friendly girl. My name's Zhi Ruo, what’s yours?"

"I'm Hakkai," Hakkai said. He sounded calm enough, to Gojyo's auditory equipment, although as far as Gojyo was concerned he should have been panicked. He couldn't possibly be programmed to deal with loose women. "Please, won't you have this tea?" 

He filled his cup with what was left in the pot and offered it to her. She smiled slyly, and Gojyo felt his alarm systems tick into wakefulness. Did she think Hakkai was interested? Did Hakkai want a rescue? He tried to look meaningfully over her head at him, but Hakkai ignored him, just like Sanzo normally did.

"I could be your special friend, Hakkai," she said, "would you like that?"

"Miss Zhi Ruo, I honestly can't think of a young lady who has been so pleasant to me in the last several hundreds of kilometres," Hakkai said, "but I am employed by an ordained monk of the most traditional views who does not allow his employees to make such charming friends."

"Traditional views?" she tittered. "Do you need to avoid roving hands when he's drunk, then?"

Hakkai smiled ruefully down at the table. "I find that I cannot say anything more on the subject." He waited a moment, looking bashful, although Gojyo was sure he was waiting for the loyalty subroutines to allow him to speak more freely again.

"Miss Zhi Ruo," he said. "It's not just my employment. My heart has already been given. I'm afraid that the lady of my heart is so precious that there is room for no other friendships."

"Huh," she said, looking like her professional interest was piqued. "What's she like?"

"Oh, some might say she is not the most beautiful of women," Hakkai said, his voice soft and gentle, "but I find her most remarkable. Her hair, so neatly plaited, like a chestnut rope, her eyes as green as grass, her hands so slender-fingered and lovely –" He laughed a little, and looked out the window, his expression that of a man looking into his own past, or an overly-clever android running rapidly through files in his memory. "Quite a goddess in my estimation, although I must admit, she was never much of a cook."

Zhi Ruo looked at him, then shrugged. 

"Working for a monk and true to his love. I'm out of luck. I hope you get paid enough to keep her in cakes, Hakkai, so she never has to learn to bake."

"You have no idea how much I wish for that," he said.

She swallowed down the last of the tea, tucked the rest of the cakes away in her shawl and left without looking back. Hakkai sat there, looking down at the table.

"I think that's that," he said after a few more moments, and rose. He paid, and walked out into the daylight. "Imagine just being able to sit, and drink tea, and perhaps read poetry and even meet friends, as long as you liked – anyway, there are food shops down the road," he said, the wistful tone vanished from his voice. "Let's go. _Don't worry, you won't have to carry everything back. I'm done with this_." He smoothed his hair into its usual obedience and held out a hand for one of the bags.

" _Were. You. Previously. Used. To. Sitting. And. Reading. All. Day?_ " It felt like asking a pit to yawn open beneath them. He thought of Hakkai's face as he described his supposed beloved to Zhi Ruo, and wondered to whom Hakkai had read his books of poetry. Hakkai shouldn’t remember a previous owner and yet –

" _I told you, I was a children's tutor._ "

" _Whose. Kids?_ "

The pit yawned wider. Hakkai looked at him, then opened his mouth and – blinked rapidly, made a stuttering noise and put a hand over his mouth, his skin actually changing colour a little. Gojyo dropped the bags and touched him in alarm, feeling that his temperature had fallen.

" _Hakkai! It! Doesn't! Matter! Stop!_ "

" _I'm all right_ ," Hakkai said, looking nothing of the sort. Then he smiled widely. " _I'm afraid I'm a re-conditioned model, Gojyo, I don't remember anything before being placed on sale where Sanzo bought me. It is quite impolite to ask, you know._ "

" _Yeah. Sorry. I. Don't. Know. What. Got. Into. Me. I'm. Just. A. Dumb. -_ " Gojyo started.

Hakkai seized his forearm. He pressed his fingers meaningfully against his own throat and looked – furious.

" _What_ ," he said, " _what's that unpleasant word people hurl at those born out of wedlock? I find I can't bring it to mind right now. It's like a hole in my vocabulary._ " 

" _What?_ " Gojyo said in surprise. " _Bastard?_ "

" _Just so,_ " Hakkai said, his fingers still hard against his own throat. " _All of them. What you said. Except for Sanzo and Goku, they're -_ " It looked like he would stop speaking again.

Gojyo pulled out one of the napkins wrapping a cake and wrote _Assholes?_ in a heavy, decisive script. 

Hakkai laughed, more weakly and artificially than his normal laugh. He dropped his hand and picked up the shopping bag.

" _We should buy the food. How efficient it is that we don't need any – we should give thanks to our creators for that. I think I'll get plenty of vegetables; Goku needs more in his diet. No more foolishness, I promise._ "

" _O.K._ " Gojyo said as they strolled along. " _I. Like. The. Real. You. Better._ "

" _Good heavens. You'll make me blush. I'll tell Sanzo and Goku, we did this in order to buy the medication, don't worry. We want to cheer Goku up, after all._ "

" _You. Made. A. Pretty. Good. Human,_ " Gojyo said. " _But. Don't. Tell. Him. About. That. Girl._ "

" _Dear me, no._ " Hakkai looked briefly at him, and away. " _I have fingerprints, did you know? How ridiculous and unnecessary. Although I suppose such a construct really could pass for human if it were somehow . . . away from its master._ " He shrugged, fluidly. Human-like. " _I shouldn't like that. What would any android do, in such a directionless life?_ "

Gojyo patted his arm, awkwardly. It was just that Hakkai was a high-spec model, he thought, and subject to odd fluctuations at times. It must come with the programming. If whatever hacks had sold him to the monastery hadn't wiped his memory properly that was on them.

He saw again the dreadful look of loss on Hakkai's face as he has sat in silence in the café. He had looked just like a stunned young man, lost and alone. It made Gojyo feel protective, as if – No. It was nothing to do with mistaking him for human.

He just needed to look after Hakkai because he liked him, and he figured Hakkai needed a friend.

**Author's Note:**

> Hakkai quotes the Sung Dynasty poet Su Tung-po on the quality of tea.


End file.
